So, after reading my previous post a couple of times, some questions came into my mind. I realized I didn't post anything about what I might be doing to prevent my girls from becoming "mean girls". So here goes:
First of all, I think it is going to help that they are so close in age. Lucy is the main one I am concerned about since we are so much alike. She has gotten a lot better since Lainey was born and can be very gentle with her sister. Sometimes though, she likes to yank the pacifier out of Lainey's mouth for kicks and giggles, just so she can try to get it back into her mouth. So, I guess just really encouraging acts of kindness between the two of them is my first thing. To really praise Lucy when she is gentle and/or actually gives Lainey her paci when she is crying!
My second thing, is really communicating/communicating "why". Kids really understand more than we give them credit for! They can really understand so much. So, when she is being unkind to Lainey or me, I really try to explain to her WHY it is mean. Even if I use big words, I feel that she understands me. I guess you could say I don't want to "dumb down" my kids just because they are young or kids. I am sure that could get positive and negative remarks, but I think communication is so important. I think it is so important that kids learn how to communicate their feelings rather than act out on them. I am by no means a perfect parent. I make mistakes and sometimes I yell even though I don't want to be a yeller. Or, I can lose patience and not communicate in a nice way. That brings me to my next point.
Third, I am trying to lead by example and it is easier said than done!!! I have two very loud children and one sounds like a pterodactyl! They can wear on my patience quickly. I have really learned to start taking deep breaths, praise(Praising the Lord for these gifts), and God's word. Sometimes all I need is silence. One time I was really having a hard time and was being very impatient with EVERYONE. At this point, I didn't want to be with anyone, not even friends. I didn't want to have to give to someone...if you know what I mean...all I wanted was some silence. So, at naptime one day, Sammie got irritated with me and I walked outside, read a couple of chapters from Proverbs and it helped me so much. What really helps me sometimes when I am reading my Bible are the notes that I have written in margins. Some of the notes contain my goals and desires for being a good and wise parent.
I guess the fourth thing would be proper discipline. This is so hard and I am not going to go to far into this. I am learning about this, too. I constantly pray for the wisdom and intutiveness I need to raise my kids. I am a really my harshest critic. Sometimes I don't feel like a very good mother and notice myself comparing myself to other mothers. I do my best when it comes to this. When she throws something at her sister and makes her cry, I will take the object away and spank her. I recently posted something about this on Facebook. So that is another reason why I won't go so far into it. I think prayer and asking God to mold and help me mold our children to be sweet is the major thing. I know that my girls are human beings and life is really learning by experience. That means I know they aren't going to be perfect, but I will do my best to encourage them to love and communicate well with people of all ages!
Are you still reading? Would you like to know what it is like to jump into a lake from 33ft?
I will be quick. To celebrate the fourth of July, we were invited by friends to go and hang out on a yacht. It was 133ft. long and 33ft high. When the boat was parked, I just climbed down the ladder and got into the lake. I had had one cocktail and was feeling relaxed. When I saw the boys start jumping into the water from the second story of the boat all I could think was, "I have got to try that." It was awesome! Well, after hanging out in the water a little while longer, someone got the idea to jump fromt the third story! Again, I told myself that I had to try it. When you jump from that high, you just can NOT think about it. I was glad I had something to relax me a little. I was one out of two girls to jump into the water from either story of the boat. Anyways, when I jumped in the feeling was just like the panic you feel when you are having a "falling dream". The three emotions I got were: panic, excitement, and elation! I literally thought "Am I going to hit the water?" When I did, I landed on my butt and it hurt a long time after that. It also lead to a huge bruise the size of soft ball on my rear end. O well! It was so worth it and I would encourage any one to do it if they have the chance!! You only live once!!
Hope all is well with everyone! Thanks for letting me share!
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